Monday, January 08, 2007

Las Vegas Here I Come

At our Christmas Party this year I won a trip to Las Vegas!!! Unfotunately I can only take one other person... sorry to all of you reading this. I decided to take my trip this Friday, January 12th. My plane leaves at 6:10 p.m. I will return Monday at 7:35 p.m.!!!! I will have TWO FULL DAYS in Vegas! How cool is that?

I am staying at Excalibur on the South end of the Strip. I figure at most I will be there sleeping 3 to 4 hours each night. I am doing a totally awesome dinner theatre including jousting at the hotel on Saturday night. It's in a large arena. The only issue I have is the fact I will be eating while watching a horse poop but it will be fun nontheless! I have something planned everyday but Monday however there will definitely be down time for any of you that have ideas of what I can do while there.

Aaron recommended the rollercoaster on top of New York New York as well as the ride where you hang off the side at Startosphere. Though I'm not a huge fan of heights I may have to check both of them out! I have also been warned of the never ending malls they have there. I surely won't waste time in a mall!

I will make sure to post how my trip went as well as pictures when I return!!

Friday, December 01, 2006

Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow

Woo Hoo the snow is here. It's amazing how good of a mood I get in when there's 5 inches of snow on the ground. Of course, it helps that I've been chauffered for the last three days while it's been snowing. I went to work Wednesday and have since let my car sleep in my work parking garage while I am carted around. It has been nice. Unfortunately I'm a nervous snow driver so it's best that I not drive at all. It looks like yesterday into last night was the last bit of snow we'll see for a while. It's clear skies for the next week or so. Good news for all the Grinches; bad news for me. I'm hoping for a white Christmas AND a white birthday (March 16). It has snowed once on my birthday that I can remember. It was three years ago. I was a senior at Park University and it was right after my 9:00 o'clock class. They were just little flurries but it was incredible. SO... cross your fingers for as much snow as we can get this year !!!!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006


There are 535 people in this world with the name Laura Stevens. There are 764,920 people in the U.S. with the first name Laura and 209,978 people in the U.S. with the last name Stevens. 99.9% of those named Laura are female... What exactly is the .1%? Possibly a male dog? I put in every name I could think of to see what came up. Try it!! Go to http://ww2.howmanyofme.com/.

Monday, October 09, 2006

Crawl for Cancer

This weekend Jason and I joined a friend from work and several of her friends down in Westport for a good cause. The gist of the event is: 20 pitchers, 10 people, 5 bars, 1 beautiful day. Our group was to go to 5 bars, drink 4 pitchers at each bar (which, thanks to me ended up being more than 4 pitchers at a couple of the bars) and then go to an after party at The Beaumont Club. Each team payed about $450 dollars to particiapate. With that contribution our team was provided team t-shirt's; ours was green, 20 pitchers of beer and then as much beer as we could drink from 6-8 at the Bueamont Club. All remaining funds (which was quite a bit seeing as how most beer was donated) went to research for cancer. The day started at 1:00, ended at 6:00 and then we partied with even more beer until 8:00. It was an awesome day. The sun was shining, people were stumbling and the cabs were abundant... couldn't ask for a better day! I saw more puke than ever before. In fact, at The Bueamont Club we got the last avaialbe table over a mound of puke... yum. We didn't care, there was still beer to drink! Jason and I shared a cab home which was roughly $30 plus a tip, however, we brought in 30 cans of green beans (best choice @ .33/can) allowing us to get $30 in taxi credit. So, we basically just paid the tip and that was it! The day was a blast and I was oh so excited to be apart of it and look forward to possibly doing it again next year. Cassie - sorry but I left my camera at home... no pictures. I promise to take some soon so you guys can see my new hair color... ooh la la...

Monday, October 02, 2006

You've All Been Missed

Where to begin?? Law school is a no go.. should I decide to apply again next fall I will be required to take my expired LSAT again. I haven't decided yet. I almost look at it as a blessing in disguise. As you know (or know now) I work for a large law firm downtown. Every single attorney here (small children at home or not) is required to put in a minimum of 60 hours. For those of you that are work-a-holics this doesn't seem so bad but it does get worse. The minimum is for those attorneys that want to squeak by... not the ones that shine and bank. Though I could easily work those hours now I know that eventually my opinion of little people will change and I will want to have one or two. Those hours would make this an impossible task, therefore, I am unsure of my legal path at the moment.

I do have excellent relationship news ! I have finally stopped my dating fiasco due to one particularly gorgeous, sweet, kind, generous (until we break up he is the good words; once broken up I will fill this sentence in with contrasting words ;-) ) man. When I was at the end of my dating rope, I met Jason. Rather than joining a nunnery and swearing off men all together I opted to date him and have been splendidly happy for the last three months we have dated... Yea me! So far there are no crazy, wacky problems that we have found out about one another. He seems to be in good physical and mental health with no psycho exes that scare the bejesus out of me. He's a 31 year old forklift fixer with an 11 year old son. His son spends alternating weekends with him so I get to see quite a bit of Jason. In fact last Friday night was "date night;" he took me out to dinner to the Outback and then to see Jackass 2 which was flippin' hilarious... definitely a must see!!!

Hmmm, work: our office moved on Friday; we now have floors 7, 8 and 9. I am now a cubicle worker. I feel like I'm stuck in the movie Office Space. It's a sea of cubes with no end in sight. Actually that's not totally true, we do have a rather large kitchen... food is always good! Aaron and his little computer buddies have been working round the clock to make sure that we are all up and running. Besides the fact that Aaron is my brother and can't do anything as well as I can, he did a pretty good job. The poor guys were literally here all night on Thursday and I'm sure most of the day and night on Friday and Saturday. So, thank you Aaron for all your hard work, you made it possible for me to post this blog today while at work!

Saturday, May 27, 2006

JUNE 8, 2006 - Mark your calendars!!!

So... it has finally happened; UMKC gave me a deadline of June 8, 2006 for me to hear a response. I emailed my contact in the admissions office inquiring about the status of my application. She responded with "You will have a decision in two weeks." Two weeks from the day I emailed is June 8, 2006. Can you believe it??? I am so excited, so nervous. I just want to know and then begin whatever it is I'm supposed to begin whether it be law school or back to Park for my Masters in Education. Cross your fingers for law school... I would kick butt at being an attorney!!!!!! Plus, you would all get some kind of discount... fine, pro bono work!

Dating: I have been going on dates with random people. I believe the next one I have is Monday at a coffee shop. He is a law student at either KU or UMKC... can't remember. He is totally cute and rather witty. Following that date I will have another on Tuesday with someone that is absolutely hilarious. We have much in common when it comes to our sarcasm. Both guys will be fun to go out with. I look forward to it.

Tonight: I am going to listen to what I thought was an Irish Punk Band but have since learned that it is a solo act who refers to himself as the Dean Martin or Frank Sinatra of the Irish World. I am slightly more hesitant to believe I can enjoy music like this but that is the plan and plans should not be broken. I will just have to bulk up on my martinis. Ain't no thing.

Monday, May 15, 2006

My Oh My

Well, I have moved back in with my dad... anxiously awaiting my law school acceptance letter (cross your fingers for me). I have resorted to sitting on the floor in my dads family room typing all hunched over... waiting for a part to come in or something... Everything that I own is crammed into one side of Dads garage awaiting the dust to fall. Thanks to Aaron and my dads friend Scotty, it was all moved. I packed the apartment up and moved the boxes over a two week period and Aaron and Scotty moved all the big furniture stuff I couldn't fit in my car. Finally, it is done. I'm curious to see what the complex charges me for. From what I hear they charge for outrageous things... stupid and silly things. We will soon see, then I will post a warning never to rent from The Ethans on Barry Road and 169.

What else - I have been on a couple of dates thus far and plan on going on many more. I am actually somewhat excited about one coming up. Granted there is no long-term ability seeing as how he works nights, I still think he'll be fun. At least I hope.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Online Dating

So, I have taken the plunge... I guess it's not really a plunge, rather a hasslefree way of dating. I have joined a free online dating service. So far the guys that are interested in me seem nice. I'm not sure I really want to date yet but am willing to try anything.

I have realized two things: one, there are a lot of lonely, single, cute guys in this city; two, I am now one of the single people. I suppose I held onto the whole ex-relationship coming back and everything working out fine for a little too long.

I'm curious about the whole process though. I mean, you send one another a wink, some silly little pre-determined comment and then what? You have to meet these people? Seems odd to me. Aaron had great success with eharmony but I'm not willing to fork over the $. I am more of a cheapy than he is. Plus, I am not very aggressive when it comes to introducing myself unless I've had one too many drinks and am surrounded by people that adore my zany side.

So... who has tried the online dating sites? What kind of luck did you have? What should I be weary of? What things should I be doing? A little advice would help me out quite a bit!

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Ode to Aaron.. and a little ranting

Well, my computer finally crashed. I've had it for several years with no huge problems. It was long awaited. Of course, my gallant brother immediately came to the rescue. I lost everything I had but that's okay. As he would say, I learned a valuable lesson about back up disks. To be honest, I still won't back up... bad, Laura, bad!!! Anyway, the only thing I have on here is Windows... no word, no Photoshop, no anything fun. Just Windows... boring. At the same time my computer went down, Aaron's apparently had the same problem... lost an entire section (or whatever) of his computer... Aaron, all I have to say is back up!!!

I have yet to hear from UMKC. The longer I wait the more I think they are just putting aside all those they are going to deny while vigorously writing their acceptance letters for those that got in. My positive, optimistic side is dwindling. I am more nervous about my LSAT (Law School Acceptance Test) now then when I took it... that is incredibly sad considering that I vomited in my mouth before taking that stupid test. I hate waiting. I am the exact opposite of patient. I have been very good until this point but believe I will begin pulling my hair out soon if I don't hear either way.

This leads me to a question. How does one learn patience? I think it would be helpful for me to take some kind of strengthening challenges.

I took this quiz (that took WAY too freaking long) and this is what it told me:

You are not a very patient person. You find it difficult to deal with anything that doesn't move at your accelerated pace, and waiting frustrates you to no end. Your inability to tolerate delay may cause problems with friends, colleagues, or family members. There are probably many situations where your patience needs work. Take some time to think about what makes you impatient and why. You may wish to consider how your lack of patience is affecting your health, particularly if you are easily angered.

I could have read that in a fortune cookie!!!!!!

Take the quiz: http://www.queendom.com/tests/minitests/patience_access.html

It also told me I am at high risk for heart disease, high blood pressure and an early death... stupid test.

Here's another interesting site: http://www.coping.org/growth/patient.htm You can determine
e if you are a patient or impatient person based on the tree hugging philosophy.... you know, this web site is not set up very well. Everything is in bullet/paragraph form... takes way too long to read. Short and simple is way better especially for a patience site.

Saturday, April 08, 2006

Saturday Night

Tonight my friend Jenny and me are going to Zona Rosa. Jenny's husband, Mike, is going to take us there and drop us off. At the end of the night, we are going to call a cab to come get us and take us to my apartment. That way, nobody has to drive drunk!!! Excellent plan!! Jenny had a son, Parker, about a year ago and hasn't had much time to go out so this will be a nice chance for her to get away from the husband and the two kids (one from his previous relationship). She's ready to get CRAZY as am I. Then again, I always am!

Last night, Liz and I went to the Royals game. Unfortunately (for whatever reason) we didn't have seats on the end of the row so we had to sit next to people. Other than that it was a fun night. It was Liz's first professional ball game so she was very excited. The Royals ended up winning 11 - 7... GO ROYALS!! I plan on going to the games frequently... they are very fun!!

Look - You can see us if you look hard enough!!!!

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Let Bye-Gones be Hello-Agains

So, in light of my new trip to Egypt I have taken the initiative to contact the one and only person I know that has ever gone to Egypt... yes, friends Guy #1 (1 of 3). If ever a broken heart was heard round the world it was when this guy broke mine. However, in light of the turning of a new leaf and the exciting and exotic vacation, I thought I could go ahead and call a truce with Guy #1. Guy #1 is from Morocco in the Northern tip of Africa. He is of course Arab and has been to Egypt to visit extensively. I have seen thousands of pictures he has taken and he apparently knows the right places to eat, drink and sleep. I'm not one to cut my nose off despite my face (at least not all the time) so I have asked for his assistance in planning my trip. I am proud to say the past is behind me and I could have a potential friend come out of this deal.

Tonight I am going to the Plaza to have a drink with Guy #1 and discuss different places I could visit while in Egypt! I am excited and oddly a little nervous. My chunky butt has gained roughly (yes, very roughly) 30 pounds. I'm not positive why I care but something about it makes me feel uncomfortable. Not because I want to reconcile; that is the last thing on my mind... I guess I just always thought if I saw him again I wanted to be gorgeous and make his toungue hang out of his mouth. That's okay, when in doubt, where something low cut!

As for yesterday's Sky Diving party.... AWESOME!!! I had so much fun it's not even measurable. There were over 200 jumps from an altitude of way up there and only two crash landings (nobody hurt). I drank a 6 pack of Corona and a pint of Butterscotch Schnapps... by 5:15 I was ready to jump out of the plane... thank God the last trip up at 6:00 was full... whew. I have planned to jump either in June or July though. I am very excited. It's funny though because when I got on the plane to go to New York, I honeslty cried the whole way I was so terrified. Now not only am I going to get on a plane (a small, dinky one at that) but I am also going to jump out of it with a parachute backpacked to me... Gotta love this new leaf turning thing!! I expect all of you to come do it with me!!!

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Catchin' Up

Well... I have been good! My birthday was fine; I feel old. Thank you to all those that pointed out I was a Quater Century old.. I have alll your names jotted down on my list of doom. Soon, you could possibly received a present of steaming poo on your doorsteps... yes, you heard me.

Not a whole lot has been going on around here. I received a call from my Dad on Thursday morning; he said UMKC lost my application. I did the appropriate thing and freaked out while nearly driving off the road and taking several other vehicles with me... good times, good times. Before this had happened, we sent my application and all required information along with it to an entirely different organization which we thought we were supposed to do. That organization took 3 + weeks to return it to me causing my application to be late. I took it up to UMKC and hand delivered it on St. Patrick's Day (not how I had intended spending the day after my B-Day). I kept the cover sheet from the organization who returned it to me on top of the entire stack of paper tagging along with my application. Apparently that cover sheet caused mass chaos. Since it was on there, nobody knew that there was an application below it... So, my application was found the whole time however, nobody realized it.

What else... I am going with some friends to this Sky Diving Grand Opening today. No, I am NOT sky diving. I like living. Anyway, apparently it is an all day free food, free alcohol into the night with live music kinda day. Sounds like a good time. They are picking me up today at noon and Lord only knows when I'll be home. It will be nice though; I don't have to drive.. YEA!! It's all the way in Harrisonville (I say that like I know where this place is).

Also, while I'm divulging information. I think it's time you are all made aware (yes, all 6 or 7 of you)... I am planning a trip to Egypt this summer before I begin Law School. I have enough money saved up to go. I have wanted to go since I was 15 years old and have every intention of going. I think it will be WAY fun and will help open my naive eyes to an entirely different world! I have been promised by each boyfriend I have had that they will take me to Egypt; apparently among many other flaws these men have possessed, unreliability is on the list. I have not found anyone to go with me, nor have I looked. I am not against the idea of going myself, in fact, I rather welcome the idea. I am such a routine hermit that I think this burst of independence and chaos will change me in only good ways. In a way, it will be a learning/educational adventure. Good times, good times!

Needless to say, I am still David Crazy; yes, it's true. I miss him however hopefully this trip will cure this unquenchable feeling. I haven't heard from him thus far. Apparently the feeling is not mutual which makes me think many of our feelings were not mutual... a bit scary when one was willing to sacrafice so much, but again... WHATEVER!!!

As parting words I would like to say that I am sorry I disappeared for so long and promise to not let it happen again. I absolutely love this blog thing and the new people I have met.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Long Awaited

I know you are all dying to know about Flogging Molly!!! IT WAS AWESOME!!! They had three or four cover bands that were very good. I had a little too much to drink and partially crowd surfed until I got so scared I almost cried. I moshed or more appropriately was moshed on. My body felt like it went through the spin cycle in a washing machine the next day but I had SO much fun. I met several guys (I know you are all anxiously awaiting this part). None of them received my phone number... not ready for that yet. Plus, I don't like it when a guy says "can I get your digits?" What the hell is that? It bothers me for some reason. I was totally taken care of by my new (and long lost) friends Brad and Nathan at the concert. They bought me drinks and made sure I had a good time. After the concert I met up with Liz and met more boys... one even ate my already chewed gum... GROSSSSSS!!! That was mildly disgusting... blucky! Liz made sure to take care of me the second half of the night!! She took me to random places in Westport; it's been so long since I've been there so it was nice to have a somewhat native guide! After Westport, Liz was gracious enough to make me a bed on her couch... THANK YOU, LIZ!!!

This weekend I went out again. Didn't have quite as much fun but I blame it on being a little more guarded. I have little bouts of the cut loose attitude. Thanks to Liz, I have someone to go out with and have fun. I don't have to sit at home and wallow in self pity or anything like that... not that I would; not really a wallower. Anyway, my weekends are fun and full which is exactly how they should be.

This weekend my mom also moved in with me. She has found a job as the Parkville Finance Officer. She used to be the Finance Officer for Platte City so she knows the ropes. Today was her first day and she loves it. Yea Mom!!!

Work is going well. I am the receptionist still. They don't want to train me for another job when I'll be leaving in August!!! Speaking of August, I have not heard from UMKC about Law School. I don't believe I could possibly be more nervous. I'm seriously going crazy!!! However, I am confident that I will end up exactly where I am supposed to be.

This Thursday is my 25th birthday... OMG; a whole quarter of a century old. This is the worst age yet... I can't imagine what 30 is going to be like. I'm excited nonetheless. Aaron, Heather (I think) and Liz have kindly agreed to go out with me. My dad is going to take me (and them) out to a birthday dinner. I'm sure my mother will be joining us as well. Afterward, we will have a couple of drinks... then I guess it's home again home again jiggity jig. The next day I thought about tagging along with some other friends, Melissa, Rachel and their rowdy crowd to the St. Patty's Day Parade. Should be fun. I thought I could get a shamrock painted on my cheek or something generic like that. It's a shame that Cassie, Amber and Quine won't be able to help me celebrate. You guys will have to have a drink for me that night!

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Just talkin'...

Well, I haven't heard back from UMKC, big surpise, it's been less than a week. I know I should be more nervous than I am but I feel this overwhelming ease that I will be accepted. It will really suck when my bubble bursts should they decide not to accept me.

David - Well, it has been a full week and one day. Oddly, I still think that he's going to show up on my doorstep with billions of daisies, a diamond and tears running down his face. That "dream" is slowly fading though. I am just entering the phase where I start to realize that he won't be in my life any longer. I guess "finding yourself" takes a while. There are moments when I have this incredible feeling of dislike for him. I have been mortified in front of my friends, family and now all those at work. Then there are other times when I notice something on a menu or walk past a store he would like and I can't control the moisture in my eyes (like now). It's so hard to think about him and not feel that somehow I'm slightly more hollow than I was before. I know break-ups are hard... I'm getting through it. It just takes time (was that convincing?)!

This weekend (Friday) I am going to see some Punk band that Jenny begged me to go to. My friend Aimee is going along as well. Afterward, if I have the energy, I will meet up with Liz for drinks at some place; loud and eventful. I would like to remember what it's like to be single since I am. It's been so long... not really though... just feels like a long time. I figure I will have an excellent Friday night. FLOGGING MOLLY... that's the name of the band we are seeing. I knew I'd remember if I just thought about it long enough. Apparently they are GREAT! I am as excited as I can be.

Diet - I have lost a little bit of weight. I am sticking to it like nobody's business. I am ready to fit back into my old clothes and then lose enough wait to fit into even older clothes!! I am very excited about that. My face (I think) has already started to thin a tad. I miss my face... thin face.

What else? I think that's it. I am just waiting... waiting for my heart to heal, waiting for law school, waiting for thinness... just waiting.

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Goooo.... ummm..... hmmm...

So I applied to LAW SCHOOL!!!!! YEA!!! I am totally excited about it. I applied to UMKC Law School! It's the only one I applied to so it's a do or die kinda situation. Once I know I am accepted, I will post my Personal Statement for all those to view. My mom loved it but I believe her to be the only one; moms have to love what you do... I think it comes in their Mom Handbook. Anyway, I can't wait to get in and begin my "new" life. I know it will still be the same life but it will be "new" because it's actually something I want to do; something I am excited about. I have come to realize over the past couple of weeks that not all attorneys are morons... Okay, so I'll start the non-moron religion... j/k. Seriously, I think that you are only as good at what you do as you are happy with what you do. I don't want to go into Corporate Law, rather I would LOVE to help people that don't understand law. I thought first about applying to work for the DA... then I would begin something that really interests me. I LOVE trial law. One of the partners at the law firm I work for does personal injury. That is interesting but I think I would rather do some kind of criminal trial law. I want to put bad people away and justify a wrong to those that were wronged (say that 10x's fast). I think that I could actually do some good out there. You never know, I may help someone!

Friday, February 24, 2006

Crazy Laws

Thanks to Amber I realized one of my interesting personality traits. I have the random knowledge of crazy laws. Below are a few of the worlds craziest (in my opinion) laws.

* In Temperance, MS, you can't walk a dog without dressing it in diapers.
* In St. Louis, a law on the books makes it illegal to park your car without turning off the
engines was to avoid scaring horses.
* In Kansas City, KS, saying the name "George Washington" without adding the phrase
"blessed be his name," can land you with a fine of up to fifty cents.
* In California, selling a gold piece without tooth marks in it is considered forgery.
* An old statute in Flint, MI, compels dentists to offer a "slug of whiskey with no additional
charge to said patient."
* In Manchester, England, an ancient law declares that if a young man develops a lisp, he must
be inspected by a bishop to ensure that he isn't developing homosexual tendencies.
* The city of San Francisco holds a copyright on the name "San Francisco." It is illegal to
manufacture any item with the name without first getting permission from the city. Since the
Supreme Court upheld the copyright, San Francisco has had an annual $300 million surplus
every year.
* In Raleigh, North Carolina, before a man asks for a woman's hand in marriage, he must be
"inspected by all the barnyard animals on the young woman's family's property, to ensure a
harmonious farm life."
* Slavery is still legal in Decatur, Alabama.
* In Salzburg, Germany, any child born on August 18th must be tested for possible witchcraft. This is due to a local legend that an evil warlock was born on that day in 1638.
* It is illegal in Kentucky to marry the same man more than three times.
* In California, it is illegal to set a mouse trap without a hunting license.
* In Tennessee, it is illegal to use lassos to catch a fish.
* If a man is wearing a striped suit, you cannot throw a knife at him in Natoma, Kan.
* In 1659, Massachusetts made Christmas illegal.
* Unless you have a doctor's note, it's illegal to buy ice cream after 6 p.m. in Newark, N.J.
* It is a misdemeanor in Montana to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime.
* Children can buy shotguns in Kansas City, Mo., but not toy cap guns.
* In Minnesota, it's illegal to tease skunks.

With that said, I wanted to take a moment to tell everyone that just because we don't agree with the law doesn't mean we don't have to uphold it. Please renew your hunting license to catch any mice should you ever be in California... you never know when the police will enforce these laws.

As a humongous side note - David and I have officially ended "it." On Tuesday he told me that he needed space to "find himself" so I asked that he stop calling/texting me. I think this is for the best. I can't be with someone that doesn't know who they are. I mean, c'mon; that is something we are born with. I don't understand how people can be confused about "who they are"... GOOD LORD, you've only lived with yourself forever. I offered to try my hardest to help him through his ordeal but he chose to do it on his own so more power to him. I am definitley not waiting around. In celebration I have opened a my space thingy; also known as JumpInDeBoat and am teetering on the idea of doing a "personals" something or other. I start my Slim 4 Life diet on Monday and intend to follow it strictly. Within a month or two I will be ideal size allowing me to get back into "the field" (who comes up with these slang terms... seriously). After the weight loss I will feel more energetic and happier about myself... plus I will actually fit into my clothes which means I will be able to go on a date.

Don't get me wrong, I am not thrilled about not having David in my life but I know I will be better for this experience. The only way I have ever gotten over my long term boyfriends is to get "back into the saddle" and start all over. So, in a month or two, that is just what I will do.

Monday, February 13, 2006


Well, it appears that my move to St. Lo is not going to happen. This weekend I went to Columbia to try my hardest to reconcile things with David... In short, it didn't work. He made it clear he no longer wanted a relationship with me therefore I left. I went to my moms on Saturday night after he asked me to leave; got there around 12:30 a.m.. Let me tell you something... Life literally sucks sometimes. All I can think about is the stupid ass that broke my heart, ripped it out of my chest, threw it on the ground and peed on it. How is that? You would imagine that someone that has put me through that much pain would be vetoed from my love thoughts... umm, no! I am so mad at myself for allowing thoughts of reconciliation to invade my mind. I honestly believed that he was willing to work on this with me.... Granted, it didn't help that he kept telling me he wanted to! I guess my problem was that I allowed the relationship to run the course he chose. I should have known better than to let a man drive... Especially not when it came to my feelings and future. Is it really fair to blame him for how I feel though? I mean, it's not like I wasn't allowing him to treat me poorly... I was there, I let it happen. I just kept telling myself that the David I knew would come back. I thought the David I knew would wake up and get rid of Dr. Jekyll. I have never met a person with such opposite emotions; way happy or way sad. It got bad when there was no way happy anymore. The past 4 months or so David has been miserable; up until Saturday night I believed this had a big part to do with me. It wasn't until Saturday night that I realized that all the depression and ill will toward me was not my fault at all rather it was his own. He got upset with me over things that were so small and silly but he was really upset about five hundred other things that I had no clue about. I only made matters worse by wanting to talk to him about what he was upset about. He obviously didn't think highly enough of me to tell me the truth about what was going on in his life, how could he talk to me about how it made him feel. BLAH BLAH BLAH!!! God, I'm the retard girlfriend that can't get over the guy...

As of today, I will improve my life. Everyday is a learning experience for me and I plan to embrace it rather than close my eyes to it. Since it is apparent that I know so little about myself (how else could I have been so naive and childish) I will take time to figure out the things I like, the things I don't like, etc. I will no longer try to rush things and make myself and others fit into this nice, neat little package. I won't trust everyone around me just because they are near... Rather they should earn that. I will put myself before everyone else since nobody else seems to share in my belief that people are good and want to help others. If I want it or believe in it I will make it happen regardless of those in my way; isn't that the human way? To end, I would say that the most important thing I have learned from David is that appearances are not always as they seem... Deep down, people are not always as what you think... always be weary of those you don't know... and even more weary of those you think you do know.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Moving on...

It's official... I am moving to St. Louis. As of February 17, 2006 I will no longer be an employee of Martin, Leigh, Laws & Fritzlen. Even though they thought they could set me up in the St. Lo office, it has become realized that I will be attending law school in August 2006 therefore will not be employed by them for any length of time. They have opted to employee me only if a temporary position opens up.

It has been a rough and bumpy past couple of months for David and I however I think it's time to either take a leap of faith or just walk away. My first inclination was to walk away however, I fear that I may be trying to take the easy route rather than the one that I should take. At first glance our relationship looks very rocky and unsteady but when you take a closer look you will find a comfort and love like no other. David has (over the past year and a half) become my best friend. If I get upset, he comforts me; vice versa. I can't imagine not having him in my life and choose not to have to tempt my imagination with that thought. Any comments, advice or suggestions are definitely welcome!

I am very sad about leaving my dad and my brother (yes, for some unknown reason, he grew on me over the years). I worry that my dad will get lonely without me. I feel awful leaving but find comfort in the fact that I will be home in 6 months to go to school. I'm not extremely excited to go to a town where I know no one and no one knows me. It's scary and almost breath-taking for someone like me. I mean, I can't even imagine bungee jumping because of the risk... Moving is like cutting off one of my hands... It's just not natural. I am a hoverer... I go where I know. I don't like adventure!!! Never have! Mostly though, I will miss my dad. He's kinda become my buddy and it's sad to think that he won't be right down the street if either of us need anything. It's horrible that your life has to separate so much. It's not fair that you can't have all of the people you love in one central setting. I don't like the idea of not being able to stop by Aaron's house to bug him at a moment's notice. In two weeks, for me to do something like that it's going to be a four and a half hour drive... That's not a quick little visit!

Soooo... Life as I know it and have know it for the past 24 years is going to change soon. I feel that this will be a good thing for me. I can get out and experience the world just a little. Obviously, I'm a family person so moving to L.A. or something is totally out of the question. I look forward to the friends I will meet in St. Lo and the different places I will go. I am confident that my relationship with David will finally find it's place in my life no matter what that may mean. I can finally have the definitions that I need. Seeing as how I won't have a job or any place to go when I first get there, I will be sure to blog daily! I will keep you all updated on the status of my moving over the next two weeks... Lots of packing is in order... Not sure if I should just rent a storage unit or take it all with me for a whole 6 months?

Sunday, January 22, 2006

It's been a long time...

I know I know... It's been FOREVER... Sorry! I have been super busy lately. Work has been kickin' my butt; I don't usually get out of there until 6:30 or so every night. Last Monday I joined Curves (the workout place for women). I am super excited to finally start exercising. It has been a long time since I've been motivated enough to actually go to the gym every night. I feel a lot better though. According to that girl in Legally Blonde exercise raises your endorphin levels which makes people happy... I feel quite a bit happier; I encourage everyone to run out and join a gym!

This weekend I went to Columbia to see David and Skyler. They are both doing well. I swear Skyler grows everytime I see him. He's a total cutie! He's going to be adored by all the girls when he gets older. He has his dads blue eyes which are absolutely gorgeous! Lucky me! On the way back I almost got into a wreck. It was near Van Brunt... in the ghetto. This guy got onto the highway; he didn't like the guy he was behind so he proceeded to try to push me out of my lane. It drives me nuts that people don't pay attention. I have been in my fair share of wrecks and I have come to the conclusion that most people shouldn't be given a license.

I believe that the driving age should be raised to 24 and all those over 65 (retirement age) should have their license revoked. We should focus on our public transportation system. How many stupid people are we going to give a license to before our community realizes that we have a lot of crazy and wreckless drivers out there?!? If it is safer to ride in a plane than drive in a car wouldn't that kind of tip people off that there's a problem with our little speeding bullets. Take New York for example; they have an awesome transit system. Granted it could take a little longer to get to work with the subway jumping that you might have to do but it would definitely be safer. I don't hear much about subway crashes or hijacks. What do you think? Do you think that the public transportation systems should be improved or we should all continue to spend thousands and thousands on cars?

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Evil; My Office Mate

So today, my less than tolerable office mate has struck again. My office mate has this evilness about her that is not quite human. I'm not saying that she's an alien, rather I believe she is the spawn of Satan... Yes, Satan. Today, while on the phone with one our two biggest clients she belittled me. She's not the smartest of the bunch so when she didn't understand something rather than saying... Hmmm, I don't get it... She stated that it was my fault that I didn't leave extensive notes in the file. It is NOT my job to train her nor is it my job to take her crap. This is the second time in three days that she has humiliated me. Three attorneys (all of which are my bosses) were in our office (or more appropriately; our cramped hole) and Evil (my office mates name) proceeded to mimic me. She started talking in a high pitched voice saying things like, "My name is Laura and I am perfect," "I love to suck up to my bosses." I know I haven't been doing this 40 hour a week thing for long (only 1 1/2 years) but I don't think it's appropriate to say things like that to the people that are paying you. The bosses slowly moved out of the office. Later that same day, she said that she wanted me to do work that has been defined as HER JOB. Usually I would say whatever and do it. She is constantly passing things off on me however, I decided to stand up for myself so I said, no thanks, that's your job. She got totally mad and refused to do it (so I did it just so it would get done and we wouldn't get into trouble). She stormed into my bosses office and claimed I wasn't being a team player. As my boss is fully aware, it is not me that is the problem rather Evil. Apparently the whole office knows of her laziness, lack of work ethic, rudeness, etc., etc. but rather than get rid of her they keep her... why you ask??? That is a very good question... one that I don't have an answer to. My dad seems to think that since we make so much money here if something isn't quite good enough, we will keep it just because it's been working that way thus far. I agree with him. Today, I asked my boss to move me. We have no space here so it was rather difficult for me to make such a request. I am to switch places with another girl in my department (she's knew and unknowing... does that make me evil?). She works out of an even smaller space than my own which will prove to be very uncomfortable and difficult to perform my job in a manner that I am accustomed to however I feel this will be an INCREDIBLE improvement over my current situation.

Okay, I just realized that I ranted and raved about a woman that I hate for an entire really big paragraph. Sad, really. She just makes me so mad.... mean, lazy people suck! :-I

Who else hates one of their coworkers???

Tuesday, January 03, 2006


Another year... It's sad really. I mean, just think, we are all going to turn one more year older in 2006. For some of you (cough cough... Aaron and David), that puts you ever so close to your graves. In celebration of the New Year, below is my list of resolutions; goals if you will.

1. Be kinder to homeless people - rather than throw change out my sunroof, I am going to buy a box of liquor to pass around and save them the trouble.
2. Lose weight - Apparently this dieting thing isn't working so I'm goint to look into things such as: liposuction, bulimia, possibly those little worms you get in Mexico that eat your stomach as well as your nearby organs.
3. Become politically active - rather than just criticize those that aren't conservative, I am going to have readily available a list of information ready sites for those that aren't conservative (no- they aren't retarded people... just severly ignorant) to learn from. I hope to accomplish this by mid March.
4. No more driving Miss Daisy - it has come to my attention that while I think I am rather brilliant behind the wheel, others are mildly fearful to get into a car with me. To remedy this I will slow down... only to tell you that you aren't allowed in my car but we can take yours if you wish.
5. Become a better citizen - From this point forth, I will no longer check the "Republican" box on the voter card... rather I will go down and make sure that I vote for each individual candidate (Republicans of course).
6. Be kinder to animals - Oh wait, I am... I live in a small zoo.
7. Stop taking animals in and wanting more - Hmm... Please keep in mind I mentioned that this list consisted of "goals" not to be confused with definite actions.
8. Go to the gym - Dad bought me a gym membership for X-Mas (thanks, Dad). With this, I may be able to avoid the organ eating worms... we will see.
9. Stop shopping at Hen House - I went there once last year to get a birthday card for my boss. Since then I have felt awful. When I was 16 or 17 they accused me of stealing a box of take-out Chinese. A little China woman came running out of the grocery store yelling at me in China language. Apparently she didn't ring up something... her mistake, not mine however I was the one humiliated for it... Another reason to hate communism.
10. Watch more college football - it has taken several seasons for me to LOVE old guy football. Now that I have achieved this, I wish to enjoy college just as much.
11. Relax - Rather than getting tense and worried about stupid things, I will take a moment to breathe so that my face no longer turns purple.
12. Be kinder to people - I will realize that when someone says "10 points if you can hit the guy on the corner" they are joking and I will no longer attempt to get my ten points...

Well, I feel that I have a very challenging year ahead of me. I ask that you all help me to achieve my goals; no matter how difficult they may be. 2005 was a blast lets make 2006 just as memorable! :-)

Wednesday, December 28, 2005


Well, this is probably the worst vacation I have ever had... so far. I have spent the last two full days at home by myself. David and I were supposed to go to Indiana to see his friend Sam... at the last minute David felt it was better if he just come and visit me; Sam would have to wait. Then at the last, last minute he decided that he would go to St. Louis and meet Sam there. He was supposed to leave at the latest 11:00 a.m. this morning however that got postponed until a little after 3:oo p.m. I'm hoping traffic won't be awful and he'll be here by 7:30 or so. Funny how life works. So, I have been going completely stir crazy the last two days. I am way too hyper to sit at home by myself and not go totally insane. Thank God Dad took me out to lunch today. That made my day. We went to Ruby Tuesdays.... yum! I also got my oil changed today and picked up an anniversary gift for mine and David's one year anniversary! Oddly I'd rather through it out the car window then give it to him but that's a completely different post.

That's all I got... I feel a lot like the cute little bird!

Friday, December 23, 2005

Fa La La La La La La La

Tis the season to be merry.... I'M DONE SHOPPING!!!! I have officially gotten everything I need for every single person on my list (as far as I can tell). My dad wants bathroom accessories which I didn't end up getting however I believe he will enjoy what I did get. And hey, you never know, I may stop and get a tooth brush holder or something....

I've taken this entire upcoming week off. Aaron and I are going to the CHIEFS game tomorrow (Christmas Eve) and then to both our mom and dads houses on Christmas Day. It will be a long Christmas Day that is for sure. It will be nice to see ALL of the family though. I think David, Skyler (his son) and I are going to go to his friend Sam's house the Monday after . David and Sam haven't seen each other in two years or so. It should be a nice reunion. Sometime next week I will probably take David up to see Mom and then we will have dinner on Thursday night with Aaron and Dad for Daddy/Daughter/Son(brother) night. Eventually, I will actually get to relax on my much needed vaca.

I still don't know what my New Year Plans are. Suggestions are welcome. I wanted to go out of town for New Years but that isn't going to happen. Two years ago I went to New York and had a blast with my mom. Last year I went to Tennessee and saw Toby Keith. This year I would like to go somewhere equally as exciting but have a feeling it will be a New Years at home. That's okay though. David has this entire week off as well so we can spend some much needed time together. Since we don't see each other throughout the week it is difficult to keep the relationship healthy and alive. Couple time is good for us.

Monday, December 19, 2005

Evil Man... who's going to be Bubba's Girlfriend... hehe

I heard about this on the news tonight and wanted to warn everyone. Apparently this guy, Michael Pinkerton was taking pictures of women and little girls with his cell phone while they were in the dressing room of Target. Just so happens to be the Target directly across the street from my apartment; on 152 and Barry Road. If you go to http://www.thekansascitychannel.com/news/5580308/detail.html you can see some pictures of the women. It's really difficult to tell who they are because of the poor quality of the photos but there's some recognizable boots. I don't know what would possess a man to do this. He readily admits doing this and the police have found child pornography on his home computer. He's just plain sick if you ask me. I hope he meets Bubba in prison... Repeatedly. He deserves everything he gets in there.

Joke for this blog: One day a man by the name of John was sitting in his prison cell with his cell mate bubba. One day john had not a thing to do and was trying to decide what he should do. Then bubba asked him, "do you wanna play some prison football?" John was confused he asked, "prison football? What's that? How do you play?" Bubba told him "To win prison football you must play with yourself, and whosoever semen hits the ceiling first gets 6 points, and to score an extra point, all you need to do is sit over in the corner and fart." So john took the challenge, they started playin with themselves, and SPLAT! Johns semen had hit the ceiling first, he was fairly excited. So bubba congratulated him. Then john went over to the corner and sat down and tried to fart, he tried and he tried all of a sudden, bubba came up behind him... John asked "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Bubba replied with, "Just trying to block the extra point."

Friday, December 16, 2005

Holiday Shopping

I hate this time of year when it comes to shopping. People are pushy, crabby and just plain nasty. I've designated this weekend to wrap up the last of my shopping. I have a couple people left to buy for but am almost done. THANK GOD! I'm tired of being pushed around by grandma's and soccer moms. Those people are crazy!

Thanks to Martin, Leigh, Laws & Fritzlen (where I work) I have enough money to buy a little something for everyone. Last Friday they presented me with a rather enticing bonus check... YEA FIRM! Now I can afford all the overpriced, made in China crap that is offered around here. I think we should make things for people. My mom would much rather have a drawing that I used my non-artistic abilities to create... Maybe not. My drawing ability is next to nonexistent.

Anyway, I'll be battling the Columbia mall traffic this weekend. I'm going to see boyfriend, David there. Hopefully I will come home with more money than I expected and all the presents that I need. HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND! :-)

Wednesday, December 14, 2005


Oh how I look forward to becoming a F.A.R.T... ahh, the joyous and lovely things I can do as a F.A.R.T... hmm, I think not. So, this is what I have found out about F.A.R.T:

This was taken from http://www.ifarted.com/DS.asp?D=Ad&TTL=Sponsor+A+Fart

Let me count the ways...
The English language seems to have been created for the purpose of confusing us; Sometimes, there are simply too many ways to say the same thing. In order to help you navigate your world a little better, we've searched high and low for alternate names and phrases for farting. We don't want you to be embarrassed by a narrow vocabulary, so in the interest of education, we humbly present to you all of the known ways you can say, "I Farted".
A Message From Below
Affirmative Action
Air-o-gant Assault
Apocalypse Now
Baking Brownies (South Park)
Barking Spider
Bathtub Jacuzzi
Bench Burning
Bench Warmer
Biological Warfare
Blowing Ye Butt Trumpet
Bottom Belch
Botty Burp
Breaking Loose
Butt Babble
Butt Chuckling
Butt Thunder
Chair Charring
Chinese Barking Spiders
Crack Splitters
Cracking a Rat
Creaky Floorboards
Cutting the Cheese
Disappointments From Down Under
Draw Mud
Dropped a Shoe
Elevator Evacuation
Fermented Revenge
Firing Scud Missiles
Floating an air biscuit
Fragrantly Impaired
Gassius Assius
Gastronomically Expressive
Gravy pants
Gusty Windflap
Gut Belch
Gut Bubble
Happy Honkers
Heinee Burp
Inverse Sniff
Inverted Belching
Methane Exit
Mud Crickets
Mud Duck
My Opinion
Natural Gas
Nature's little surprises
Nature's musical box
Nuclear Farts- 40% fallout
Obnoxious Coughing
Odiferous Objection
Ooh, that's a nasty cough
Oops! I let Fluffy off the leash
Paint-Peeling Predicament
Pant Stainers
Panty Burps
Pull My Finger
Rancid Reaction
Rancid Rebate
Rat Bark
Revolting Release
Ripping the seat
SAV (Silent And Violent)
SBD (Silent But Deadly)
Sheet Ripping
Smelly Snoring
Speak To Me ol 'Toothless One
Stepping on a Duck
Stinky Sneezing
The Great Brown Cloud
There Goes a Mouse on a Motorcycle
Thunder from Down Under
Tree frog
Trouser Cough
Trouser Ghost
Trouser Rippers
Tuba Tuning
Tunnel Trumpting
Unappreciated Air
Unholy Airlock
Unsun Melody
Vapid Chatting
Vulgar Vapor
Waiting to Exhale
Who dropped their guts?
Who opened their lunch box?
? 1998-2003 World2 Toys All Rights Reserved. Information: WebMaster@IFarted.com

Something tells me that when my brother said I could eventually become a F.A.R.T he wasn't talking about a Vulgar Vapor or a Trouser Ghost. Though I may have taken him a bit too literally I have learned much in my voyage through web space to learn about F.A.R.T. For instance I have learned that when you fart in a shower, it smells worse partly because of the enclosed space and partly because of the humidity enhancing a persons smell. I guess the humidity cleans out your nose so well you can gag yourself with your own Stinky Sneezing. For years I have wondered about that. So that you aren't all left in the dark about your Mud Crickets please take look at the below sites I have found for your viewing pleasure.

http://www.ifarted.com/HP.asp - Please note that this link will allow you to sponsor a fart... VERY COOL. I hope you all take the time to help the lost and homeless Heinee Burps. They need your help just as much as you need there's.


Monday, December 12, 2005

Day 1

My very first blog... My brother has encouraged; no requested that every single person create a blog. My blog is created in honor of my brother.... The Big Cheese. Thanks for all that you have taught me!